


I'm Real And I Love You

by Leviusify



Category: Original Work
Genre: Cuddling, Delusions, F/M, Grief, Hallucinations, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Loss, Mental Illness, Mourning, Psychosis, Schizophrenia, Suicidal Delusions, Suicide Attempt, mental health, unhealthy relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-12 22:40:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29392098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leviusify/pseuds/Leviusify
Summary: Morgan's girlfriend committed suicide, but luckily she has come back to him. She says that he needs to go to the afterlife with her and they can be together forever, but can she be trusted? One thing is for certain: She is real.She is real.She is real.She is real.She is real.
Relationships: Original Female Character/Original Male Character
Kudos: 3





	I'm Real And I Love You

**Author's Note:**

> You'll notice if you pay attention during the story, Ashley will interact with objects and move them on her own. How is this possible if she's a delusion? There's two reasons:
> 
> 1: She is real, and she loves Morgan.
> 
> 2: This is Morgan projecting his actions onto his delusions so that he doesn't have to take responsibility.
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

“I love you.”  
As we sat on the couch of my small apartment, I imagined my hands gently caressing through her hair. I remembered her short, brown cut, which felt like heaven to stroke my hands into as we would lay together.

The TV in my room droned on in a sea of noise, but neither of us would ever pay attention to it. That I remember. Even though I couldn’t feel her now, I would remember the small give of her pale skin, and always her gentle sobs. She didn’t cry anymore though. I imagined my grip tightening on her waist, and my chin digging into her shoulder as I whispered “I love you too.”

Ashley turned her head back to look at me, and pouted, disappointed. “Don’t think that.”

I frowned. “Think what?” She smiled and I imagined her kissing me on the cheek before continuing. 

“You don’t have to imagine anything, Morgan. I’m right here. I’m with you.”

I sighed, exasperated, and turned around on the couch, only to find her reappeared in front of me. I mumbled “Dr. Mullins says I shouldn’t do that with you anymore. She says to start treating me, I need to say that I'm imagining when I do things with you. She says that some imagination is good, but eventually there won’t be any at all if I keep taking my medicine.” 

Ashley looked devastated. “Morgan, you said you wouldn’t take it! I don’t want to be all alone!” I imagined brushing my hands through her hair again. “I know. I’m not. I still want to be with you. It’s just that I’ll get in trouble if I don’t follow Dr. Mullin’s advice, babe.” I imagined myself leaning in to kiss her, before she suddenly jerked back.

“Morgan! Don’t use that word! I’m here! We’re together!” Her lip wobbled. “Sometimes, I don’t even think you know we’re together still…” I imagined- I wrapped my arms around her neck and pulled her closer. “I won’t use that word anymore. I promise.” She smiled and kissed my neck, snuggling closer to me. “Thanks, babe! That means a lot to me. It’s lonely where I am. I wish you were there.” 

She had kept talking to me about that, since the day I got her back. When she left me, I was a wreck. I felt hopeless beyond compare. Each day, I would visit the roof and wonder why she jumped. 

Was I not enough for her? Was she upset with me? Could she control it? Each day, I would head up to the roof, and then return to my room and sleep, and cry, and mourn. It was two months before I got her back. 

I was up on the roof, and she was there with me. She sat on the edge, swinging her legs. I thought it was a bad dream at first, that I would have to relive her jumping all over again. When she leapt up and put her arms around me, I knew it wasn’t a dream. I could finally feel her again. Be with her again.

At first I was overjoyed, but eventually things got worse. She would always complain about how lonely it was where she was. She kept wanting me to join her. When I told her I was right there, she didn’t understand. She said she wanted to be with me, in the afterlife. She said it was so dark, so lonely, and she came back to bring me with her. 

One day, she grinned and dragged me by my hand, and led me up the stairs of the apartment to the roof. She told me to jump, and I had to comfort her all night as she cried when I wouldn’t. She sobbed and sobbed about how she would be alone forever.

After this was when I decided to go see Dr. Mullin. She told me that what was happening was unhealthy, and that she wasn’t really back. I didn’t believe her, as I could touch her and feel her and talk to her, but Dr. Mullin said that was just my mind playing tricks on me. 

She was lucky that I made Ashley wait in the waiting room, but when I came out, the look on her face told me that she had somehow heard everything.

“I have to visit Dr. Mullin today.” I spoke. She frowned and turned her head to me, nestling her head into my chest. “Please stay home. Tell her you’re sick and can’t come. She can’t make you go.” 

I was saddened hearing this, as it was through my mistakes I had to keep going. “I already told her everything. If I stopped going now, she’d get the state involved. She would take me to an asylum and they would force me to take my meds.” 

She wrapped her arms around me, hugging me tighter. “You always let me come with you, but you never let me in the room with you.” That was the one rule Dr. Mullin said would help to begin my eventual treatment. She said that her room was a place for just me and her to talk with each other, and my delusions were not allowed to hear. 

She told me that once I was taking the meds enough, my grief induced hallucinations would die down. She said that in about a year, all this would be a bad memory. I was broken out of my thoughts by the gentle sound of sobbing.

I looked down at Ashley, crying into my chest. “Is that all I am to you, Morgan? A delusion? I came back just for you, and you try to get rid of me?” She sniffled. “No, Ashie, please-” She interrupted me. “That doctor whore you keep seeing, she just wants to break us apart. She doesn’t see our love, and I wonder if you can't either!” 

I hold her tightly against me and say “I won’t see her today if it makes you happy, I promise. I promise. I love you.” She looked up to me, tears in her eyes. “R-really, Morgan? You’d do that for me?” I hugged her tight against my chest. “I’d do anything for you. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.” 

She nuzzled her head against my chest, and beamed. “I love you so much, Morgan. I’ll call Dr. Mullin for you.” She dug out my cell phone from my pocket and dialed her number, before handing the phone to me.

The phone rings three times before she picks up. “Morgan? Is this about our session today?” Ashley whispered into my ear, and said “Tell her you don’t want to come to her stupid sessions anymore.” I ignored her, and said “Hey Dr. Mullin. I’m feeling pretty sick today, I don’t think I’ll be able to come.” I heard an exasperated sigh on the other end of the phone.

“Morgan, are you sure you’re just sick? I’m worried about your mental state right now.” Ashley fumed and frowned. “That bitch.” I looked worriedly at the phone, wondering if Dr. Mullin had heard her. Ashley grinned at me and said “Tell me you love me.” I looked nervous and flushed as I heard Dr. Mullin speak. “Morgan? Are you there?” I quickly whispered “What if she hears?” Ashley laughed. Her laugh was so adorable. She nudged me, expectantly. I spoke, loud enough for the phone to pick it up. “I love you, Ashley.”

Ashley giggled and kissed me. “Tell me that I’m real and you love me.” She stared at me, her gaze mesmerizing. “You’re real, Ashley. I love you.” There was silence on the phone. I quickly hung up. Ashley laughed and hugged me tightly. “That was amazing, Morgan!” I allowed myself to smile a bit. “...Yeah. I guess it was.”

Ashley gave me another kiss. She sat up from the couch and pranced around the room. She trotted over to the couch and spoke to me. “Morgan, let’s flush your meds!”

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea Ashley. Dr. Mullin said I still need to take them, and I can’t just stop them all at once. I have to ease out of them.”

Ashley scowled. “Don’t talk about that stupid doctor anymore. You’re done with her. Here, I’ll just do it for you.” Ashley casually began to stroll into the bathroom. I leapt off the couch and when I arrived into the small restroom, she was already emptying out the contents of my medicine cabinet. 

“Ashley, I’m not sure about this. The doctor said there could be some pretty nasty side effects if I stop taking them all at once…” Ashley stopped emptying out the pills into a pile, and held onto my arms, tightly. “It doesn’t matter, Morgan. As long as we’re together, we can do it. I promise.” I bowed my head, our foreheads touching each other. “It’s going to be alright, Morgan. Everything will be fine.” I looked to the pile of pills, and the empty orange bottles next to them. I smiled. “Everything will be fine.”


End file.
